Related Articles
« MO »
About the Author
Amanda Mills is a 20-something goth girl who lives in South Africa, with her daughter, significant other and a clutch of idiotic lizards — who ought to know better. Her apartment is crammed with stars and faeries and bead curtains and columns of ever-present incense smoke, much to the annoyance of her neighbors.

Mostly she can be found at 5 AM in front of the computer with a packet of marshmallows and a goggle-eyed lizard or two. She also enjoys going out to clubs and writhing about in an apoplexy of elegant goth moves. Other than that she offers a tarot service to all her beleaguered friends and occupies her working hours being an accountant.
« MO »

Ill | Kim Traub

   

   

   


Without
Amanda Mills
This night, studded with stars
crystal tears the angels cry
even heaven hurts with me
i am not with you
every thing i touch is
streaked with blood
thoughts like razor blades and mud
In this darkness
it’s fine by me
it’s still ok to never see
all my demons
cry with me
i am not with you
sketch by sketch and lines of pain
every dream i dream’s the same
This night, studded with stars
Lost, i am, and lonely
undeserving is my fortune
flowers in my hands
are full of thorns
fashioned into crowns for pretty
i am not with you
play with shadow men,
my friends here in this sweet hell that never ends
This night, studded with stars
Come to me, oh god
i can’t wait anymore
torn, lying, pools,
blood on the floor
i am not with you
i’ve never known
tear me apart, love,
flowers blown
everything is stupid,
all are lies
nothing’s right and
all i do is cry
i am not with you