Isn’t that that Skinny Puppy book?” a friend of mine asked, upon seeing a copy of Go Ask Ogre on my cluttered desk.

Indeed it is, but this book is beyond being “the Skinny Puppy book”. Go Ask Ogre is a cathartic memoir of the teenage years of Ms. Jolene Siana, who began writing to Nivek Ogre, the frontman of Skinny Puppy, back in the late 80s. Letters and segments of her journal knit together the story recounting her turbulent teen years. It was during those pivotal years that she had to grow up with an abusive, alcoholic mother while also being labeled a freak in her hometown of Toledo, Ohio.

Siana chose to write in order to release her intimate thoughts and feelings on paper; a large portion of her writing were letters to Ogre. She did in fact receive scattered responses from Ogre and managed to meet him at several concerts where he promised her he’d save and return all of her letters one day. Many years later, they were returned to her from this unlikely hero. It was never Siana’s intention to share these missives with anyone, however, she felt that a project of this nature could have a very positive merit with those who were also suffering from depression.

I believe the subtitle “Letters from a Deathrock Cutter” is misleading; the focus isn’t entirely on her self-injury, but the emotional pain she endured as she felt like her life was out of control.

This book is a quick and compelling read and is relatable if you’ve ever kept a journal. Personally, it brought me back to the mood of the zine scene in the early 90s, when at the time lots of folks from all over were reaching out to make contact with like-minded individuals. Letters and envelopes were lovingly drawn and painted on or collaged. The tactile experience of creating and physically sending off these various letters, “slambooks”, chapbooks, zines, etc., and the anticipation of receiving them just doesn’t translate to the internet. I’m certainly happy to celebrate the grassroots-ness of LiveJournal and MySpace, but this book really made me feel nostalgic for those pre-Internet years.

Writing can be incredibly therapeutic outlet. It takes a lot of nerve for those who can willingly share their most intimate and personal thoughts with others. Brutally honest and darkly humourous, Ms. Siana, who continues to write in her current home of Los Angeles, demonstrates through her book that one can rise above their most darkest days.